Around this time every year, the wrestling dirtsheets start buzzing over WWE Royal Rumble hype and rumors due to the high-possibility of surprise returns. Last year showcased the return of Booker T and Kevin Nash from their stint in TNA, but we’ve seen WWE Legends, celebrities, and supposedly injured wrestlers show up in the years past. Kayfabe and I talked about this for a while and came up with people who we can expect to see tomorrow night.

Will we be right? Is there someone you think that’ll show up tomorrow night that isn’t listed? Feel free to leave a comment after the click-through.

Kayfabe: There’s only one surprise entrant into the Royal Rumble that I’ll care about, but I’ll get to that later. Let’s look at the big names that are possible right now: Goldberg and Brock Lesnar.

Hoarr: Not gonna happen. Goldberg would want a major payday. Lesnar would want a major payday along with some kind of long-term plan to keep the money rolling in.

Kayfabe: It’s a long shot for either of them. If there were talks about Lesnar having a match at WrestleMania, we would have heard about it by now.

Hoarr: Yup. The WWE isn’t going to spend a year building up The Rock/Cena only to have it overshadowed by Lesnar/Punk.

Kayfabe: Besides, is that something you throw away by having him show up at the Royal Rumble? You advertise that shit. Who’s on the roster that we haven’t seen in a while? Who’s one injury away from being deaded that is just hardcore enough to give it one more go?

Kayfabe: That’s right. Edge. The R-Rated Superstar himself. Wrestlers have come out of retirement before, and it’s not like he’s in terrible shape. Ideally, this would work if Christian had stayed a face all year and was fighting to get back his title. What a dick move it would be for Edge to get up off the couch just to cost him that opportunity and steal it for himself. That would have been nice.

Hoarr: That’s crazy. Edge retired due to injuries. He’s not going to risk paralysis for a cheap pop that only ends up with him being eliminated.

Kayfabe: It’s unlikely…maybe in a couple years. However, what I do foresee is
a dance off of some type. Maybe something between Brodus Clay and the Godfather.

Hoarr: My money would be on Rikishi returning due to his connection with the Usos…or maybe the “The Cat” Ernest Miller returning to get his theme music back from Brodus.

Kurtis: Well, MY money is on a dance off between “The Funkasaurus” Brodus Clay and Das Wunderkind Alex Wright! That’s money, Vince.

Hoarr: You’re nuts.

Kayfabe: Noted. There’s only one person I want to see return though and that’s the Prince of Perversion himself, Goldust.

Kayfabe: Cody Rhodes is a dark horse in this year’s Royal Rumble. He held a midcard title for several months now and flirted with the main event during his feud with Randy Orton. A Rumble win could give him that extra push he needs to be seen as a credible threat, but I would hold off on that to give us the match we’ve been dying to see.

Hoarr: This is only thing you’ve mentioned so far that could most likely happen. Goldust returning to start a feud with his younger brother would be fun to watch.

Kayfabe: Give Cody Rhodes his WrestleMania moment. We could even see an Elimination Chamber tag team match between Goldust and Booker and the reuniting DiBiase and Rhodes.

Hoarr: He’s injured, though.

Kayfabe: Okay then…we can see that money match of Goldust and Booker T vs Cody Rhodes and Hardcore Bob Holly. You know you want to see that. We all do. Make it happen, Vince!

Hoarr: Well, based on a theory that only exists in my mind, I expect that the WWE will continue to pull storylines from WWE ‘12 in order to validate the game’s weird roster. In the next week or so, there will be a DLC Pack that coincidentally features three people who I think might make an appearance tonight at the Rumble.

Hoarr: Mama Foley’s Baby Boy! The Hardcore Legend himself! He’s on good terms with the WWE, he’s been seen around the WWE Universe lately, he was recently spotted on 30 Rock; Mama Foley’s Baby Boy’s stock has never been higher!

Kurtis: The only reason I didn’t include this is because it’s already been announced.

Hoarr: wat

Kurtis: Foley WILL be in the Royal Rumble match. Hopefully, as Mankind and not just New York Times Best Seller Mick Foley. Forget Kane, Foley needs to put the mask back on.

Hoarr: Shows how much attention that I’ve been paying to the WWE. I’m for it! Bang, Bang!

Hoarr: He won numerous championships throughout his career, but he never was the last man standing in a Royal Rumble during his time in the WWF. CM Punk has been stealing some moves and mannerisms from the Macho Man lately, so it would make sense for Savage to be gunning for the current WWE Champion. The current WWE roster would be shaking in their boots once that “Pomp and Circumstance” hits.

Kurtis: Can you imagine the nuclear heat if they played Macho’s entrance and Heath Slater came out instead? If Vince had any testicular fortitude, he should be taking notes. As much as I want Macho to rise from the grave to return, I’d rather they stick with commercial tie-ins and include Bonesaw. I hear he’s ready.

Hoarr: Ohh yeaaah — he’s dead. Too bad.

Hoarr: I guess this means that the last person left would be Batista. Recent photos show that he’s still in shape, even if he’s slimmed down considerably. I’m sure that he could show up for a couple of quick Batista-Bombs, maybe even a botch or two before being thrown out. Plus, last week’s release of The Scoprion King 3: Battle of Redemption featuring “The Animal” gives credibility to my bullshit rumor about his involvement in this year’s Rumble as far as I’m concerned.

Kurtis: What recent photos are you talking about? Surely not these:

Kayfabe: Guy looks like an Ethiopian child and that was only 3 months ago. Don’t get me wrong, I would mark out harder than Steve “The Turtle” Weiner if Batista returned, especially sporting that douchey looking mohawk, but not if he’s off the juice and looking more like Gillberg than Goldberg these days. Now, if Batista showed up in Ring of Honor to hand out Batista Bombs to every 4 foot 9 vanilla midget on the roster, that would be a different story.

Hoarr: I’m sticking with Batista being involved…or maybe Vickie Guerrero. Those are my picks.